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One Simple Secret: Stopping These "Lures"
in Their Tracks
Cut the Conversation!
"Do not get into a conversation with them. As soon as they start to talk to you, get out of there...Bam, you’re out of there…Get your knees in the breeze." - Detective J.J. Bittenbinder, "Street Smarts: Straight Talk for Kids, Teens & Parents," PBS
"You must be prepared to handle inappropriate behaviors immediately to let the abuser know that you will not tolerate abuse." - Denise Martin, founder of SAVVY! Portland, Oregon
One of the most empowering messages regarding staying free from the lures of Tricky People was presented by
Detective J.J. Bittenbinder in his Street Smarts video. He explains that "anytime you have a lure, and
he [the abductor] starts the lure, it’s a dialogue you have with the child. As soon as the dialogue starts
the kid says ‘no’ and walks away. And I don’t care what lure it is, it’s over….You don’t allow a dialogue."
The more the dialogue continues, the more "engaged" the child becomes and the more easily he or she will be seduced by the
"scripts" of the molester or abductor. But the child has one strong power, which will allow him to stop
the lure in its tracks. If your child understands this one simple rule- cut the dialogue!-his chances of
being "lured" by strangers is reduced dramatically.
If a stranger comes to you
And starts to lay a rap
Don’t hang around
Don’t fall for his trap 1
The message of "cutting the dialogue" brings with it a source of power for the child. Children
are at an extreme disadvantage compared to an adult’s size and mental capability. A child may think,
"How can I stay safe? What power do I have over a big adult?" They may be smaller than an adult, but
they still have power. They have eyes to see, ears to hear, a voice to yell, legs to run and feelings to
trust. Children should understand that they have those powers and that being smart is better than
being big and tough.
You’ve got your eyes that can see
You’ve got your ears that can hear
You’ve got your heart that can feel
You’ve got your feet that can get up
And run like the wind 1
When children understand that they have the choice to "cut the dialogue" and use their powers
to stay away from Tricky People, they will understand that they can keep themselves safe.
Action Steps
1. Instruct your child how and when to "cut the conversation.”
The rules regarding talking to strangers apply here: if a person that your child does not know tries to
start a conversation, your child should "not make the connection." Instead, he or she should "cut
the dialogue." Look away, walk away, and, if necessary, yell for help and run away.
2. Test your child’s ability to "cut the conversation."
Practice a variety of engaging "lines" that might attract your child to respond, such as "That’s a cool
skate board you’re using, where did you get it?" or "You’re so pretty. Have you ever modeled?" Then,
have your child show you how to "cut the conversation" and get out of there.
1 "G.O.M.F.” (Get Outta My Face) from Can’t Fool Me! Yello Dyno Records.
Copyright © Yello Dyno. Since 1987 Yello Dyno has helped more than 1 million children "walk tall" and "be smart" in today's exciting but increasingly dangerous world. The program provides educators, parents, and children with carefully designed educational and recovery tools. Through Yello Dyno, the children's safety champion, the program's unique entertainment-driven approach assures that personal safety for children is fun, non-fearful and empowering. Mention My ParenTime with any order and receive a discount! Reprinted with permission.
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